Oh, Dear Lord

My disdain for Bill Simmons is well-documented, but I still read his columns because he sometimes makes good observations, can be entertaining at times and provides easy fodder for ridicule and mockery.
Occasionally I chuckle at his stuff, but more often than not I'm left with the desire to wipe that self-satisfied smirk off his face with a 2x4 like I'm Jim Hacksaw Dugan. Today, though, I didn't even have to read Simmons' column to get that hankering, as the preview on ESPN.com's front page was enough to make me nauseous and angry in one fell swoop:

Why is the Sports Guy wearing the Manning Face? Because he had a sobering realization between San Diego and Indianapolis: His beloved Pats have become the NFL's version of the Yankees.

There's no way to follow that up, so I'm not going to even try.