Maryland-Wake Preview

It won't get any national attention, but there's a huge game tonight in the ACC as Maryland (7-6) travels to Wake Forest (6-6) for a true bubble-bursting tilt on Tobacco Road.

Five Reasons I Like Wake Forest

1) They play well at home
For the season, Wake Forest is 14-1 at home, with wins over Duke, BYU and Miami. On the road, they are 2-8.

2) The steady improvement of freshmen Jeff Teague and James Johnson
I'm starting to like Jeff Teague. Like, "like like" him. Chris' Sports Blog resident UVA expert Spiro had compared Teague to a young Randolph Childress, high praise indeed.
The NCAA just started selling old basketball games on DVD, so I got my cousin two old MD games for Christmas - the 2002 Elite Eight game vs. Connecticut and Len Bias leading MD to the first ever victory by an opponent in the Dean Dome in '86. That UConn game is largely forgotten, but was a fantastic game. Juan Dixon and Steve Blake held off the Huskies, who were led by Caron Butler's 32. Where was I going with this. Oh, Randolph Childress. Anyway, in ordering those two games for him, I one for myself: The famous 1995 ACC Championship where Childress dropped 37 on a UNC team featuring Rasheed Wallace and Jerry Stackhouse. Childress is simply awesome in that game - as is Rasheed, for that matter. A guy named Duncan wasn't too bad for Wake either. My second favorite moment of that game is when Childress hits his first three and on the way back down the court, he kind of shakes his head in the same way that MJ did during the NBA Finals against the Blazers in '91. It's like he knew he was going to be unstoppable that afternoon. My favorite moment:

I was hoping to find that clip on YouTube, so I Googled "Randolph Childress ACC Tournament" and got too many hits to search through. So, on a lark, I typed in "Randolph Childress breaks off Jeff McInnis". The video immediately popped up.

3) Greivis Vasquez
I've never hated a player on a team I like more than Greivis Vasquez. (And it's not just that I have to look up how to spell his name every time I mention him.) For somebody with so much talent (the way he weaves through defenders to the basket and kisses a teardrop off the top of the glass is quite impressive), he plays the dumbest basketball I've ever seen. He forces things too much, particularly on big possessions. He is careless with his ball-handling (his turnover rate is, um, prolific). He gives up on defense far too much, getting driven on more than the Autobahn. (Watch the go-ahead basket scored by Miami last Saturday. Greivis gets juked by a basic head-fake and then quits on the play.) And he has the worst case of TSS (Trent Stickland Syndrome) I've seen since the disease's namesake graduated from Wake. (TSS is an affliction that causes players to take ridiculous shots during a game. When one of those shots inevitably goes in, the player feels it is his right duty to shoot even more ridiculous shots because of the one that ended up going in. It's like Trent had a highly-selective memory that only remembered successful baskets, not the ten unsuccessful ones that preceded them. But I digress.)
The Greivis-hatred is spreading. I sent out an email to some friends earlier in the week to see who wanted to go out to watch the game. I concluded, "so let me know if you're trying to meet up to watch Greivis Vasquez heave up inexplicable three pointers and Chas McFarland throw elbows like he's Alonzo Mourning's long lost son."
Tony responded, "I need only to have something like a nerf ball to throw at the screen for when the "human turnover" invariably makes what will be one of many completely inexplicable plays during the course of the game." That was followed by another email today from The Commish that read, "sounds good.. i'll head to GB's right after work. should be there by 8:15pm... just in time to see Greivis shoot his 10th three-pointer." Keep in mind, both those guys went to Maryland.

4) Wake played really, really well at Carolina
The score (89-73) isn't indicative of that, but the Deacs hung tough with the more experienced Tar Heels and showed the fortitude that was evident in their win over Duke. Carolina is clearly better than Wake, but it certainly didn't hurt their cause when Chas McFarland got in foul trouble early or when the refs allowed Wayne Ellington to clearly travel before he hit a backbreaking three at the halftime buzzer (which put UNC up nine). Still, it was one of those "good losses" for Dino Gaudio's crew. They didn't let the game get completely out of hand and they proved they can hang with the big boys. The Duke win was a confidence builder; the Carolina loss was a confidence sustainer.

5) Six weeks ago in College Park, the Deacs shot dreadfully yet were very much in the game
Despite starting the game 3-28 from beyond the arc, the young Deacs stayed with the Terps in just their second ACC road game. Coming off a 39-point road loss to Boston College, the Deacs couldn't hit anything, shooting 34% from the field. Harvey Hale was particularly bad, going 1-9 from the floor. Somehow, though, Wake kept the game close, missing on numerous open looks late in the game to cut the MD lead to three or four. If they could hang that close six weeks ago on the road, I like their chances now at home.

Five Reasons I Like Maryland

1) They are an awful match-up for Wake
The Deacs match-up well with smaller, quicker teams that play on the perimeter. (Like Duke.) Against a team that runs their offense through the paint, they struggle - particularly when Chas McFarland gets in foul trouble, as he inevitably does.
When Maryland is playing well, they get the ball inside to James Gist and Bambale Osby. Covering one would be hard for Wake. Covering both: Not good. Six weeks ago the two combined for 26 points, 19 boards and 8 (!) blocks.

2) Landon Milbourne
When you look at the sophomore forward's numbers, they aren't overly impressive. Or impressive at all. But Milbourne always seems to be in the thick of the play; scrambling for a loose ball, coming up with the clutch rebound, making the extra pass. At this point, I'm probably giving him more credit than he deserves, but if you haven't watched much of MD this year, keep an eye on #1 the next time you do.

3) They already beat Wake once
Stat of the day: Maryland's best win in terms of RPI was, of course, against #3 North Carolina. Their second-best RPI win: Over #63 Wake Forest. At this moment, I'm baffled that anybody would think Maryland is "in" the NCAA Tournament. Even with a victory tonight, I don't know how the Selection Committee could justify giving the Terps a berth unless they win out in the ACC.

4) Every time you count a Gary Williams team out, they come back and surprise you
It's been happening for nearly 20 years. Their "comeback" this season after the losses to American and Ohio was the first time I was surprised that a Williams-led Terps team came back from the dead, which has made their recent collapse all the more disappointing. Logic says that the Terps have packed it in, but logic never applies to his teams. Don't be surprised if Maryland loses out. But certainly don't be surprised if they win two of their next three, make a little run in the ACC Tournament and make all this bubble talk a distant memory by Selection Sunday.

5) Too good to be true?
Wake Forest starts two freshman and three sophomores. Their head coach died unexpectedly in the summer, leaving the team in disarray two months before the season. That they're even in a position to play a meaningful game on February 28 is beyond any fan's wildest expectations. It sounds silly, I know... A 6-6 team isn't anything to get excited about. But this year, for this team, it is. The problem is, this season has all the trappings of ending in disappointment, even though the fact that the team has made it this far is a triumph. That's what I'm worried about: Losing perspective. A majority of Redskins fans lost it before Sean Taylor was even buried. The spent all week talking about how life was bigger than football, yada, yada, yada. Then they were bitching out Joe Gibbs for calling two timeouts. Wake fans shouldn't be upset if the team slumps in the next two weeks. We should be happy that they were in a position to make us disappointed in the first place.

Bruce Pearl's Ties Are Entirely Too Long

The Tennessee coach is a pretty dapper guy. I'm a big fan of the orange suspenders he frequents. But, Bruce - bubby - come on. What's with the ties that come down to the crotch? Top of the belt buckle, no longer. Even with suspenders on (and, subsequently, no belt), the same rules apply. Bruce... You're better than that.
(Update -- 11:26 p.m.) I've been thinking that Tennessee was going to be my pick to win it all for the past month, but after watching the ridiculously stupid way they closed their loss tonight at Vanderbilt, I'm feeling a lot less comfortable. Terrible shot selection, poor defensive decision making and a general sense of uneasiness in the clutch. Chris Lofton is a great player, but sometimes he takes shots that would make Greivis Vasquez say, "yo, dawg..." Also, congratulations to the SEC officials who let this game go on until 11:freakin:30. You know you don't need to call a foul every time opposing players make contact, right?
Also, you know what's not fun? Cops surrounding a court so college students can't storm said court after beating the #1 team in the country. Doesn't the Nashville Police Department remember what happened in Die Hard 3 when all the cops were focused on the school bomb threat, thus leaving Simon Gruber and his cronies to rob the Federal Reserve with ease? It must've been Christmas in Nashville tonight with all the police guarding the dangerous student body from running on the hardwood floor. Commendations for all!)

J.J. Redick Is Sad

Languishing on the end of the bench for the Orlando Magic, J.J. Redick thinks about giving it all up and backpacking through Alaska because he really liked the book Into The Wild (except, I'm assuming, for the part where the main character dies). Or so says Brian Schmitz is his wildly-entertaining article on the former Duke star. Seriously, Redick (making around $1.5 million this year) feels sorry for himself because he's not getting a lot of playing time and feels disrespected. I can't tell if Schmitz is empathizing with Redick's situation or subtly mocking it. Either way, the article is a delight. Read it all. (Thanks to reader G. Eliot for the find.)

This Should Make For A Good Rap Song

At least Vinny Cerrato can do something right. Of course, I anticipate seeing a $25 million contract offer to Bryant Johnson any day now.

21300 Redskin Park Drive u Ashburn, VA 20147 u 703-726-7000
www.redskins.com

PRESS RELEASE

For Immediate Release

February 26, 2008

REDSKINS RELEASE WR LLOYD

ASHBURN, VA – The Washington Redskins announce today that they have released wide receiver Brandon Lloyd.

Sampson, Smartypants!

* Sportsline reports that Indiana's plan to fire head basketball coach, and cheater, Kelvin Sampson could cause prominent team players to quit the team. Or, more than likely, Sampson's dismissal will cause prominent team players to put on a front about how they'll quit the team, until they realize how stupid it would be to stand behind a guy whose getting whacked and change their minds. Considering the two most important players on the team, senior D.J. White and freshman Eric Gordon, will be in the NBA next year, this already-weak threat can't hold much water in Bloomington. The first person that needs to go at Indiana isn't Sampson though, it's the guy who hired him. With the exception of Jason Whitlock, anyone with common sense and a basic knowledge of Sampson's recruiting practices at Oklahoma knew that his hiring at Indiana was, at best, baffling. He was a loser who lost even while cheating. As I wrote two years ago on the day of his hiring, "That Oklahoma can’t even have success while cheating says more about Sampson than any criticism I can come up with. I mean, say what you want about Jim Calhoun, but at least the man gets results from his blatant disregard for the rules."
I love the fact that not only is Sampson a bad coach, but he's bad at cheating. I still can't believe Indiana hired him in the first place.

* Josh Levin writes an entertaining column at Slate detailing the absurdity of the modern NBA salary cap system. In it, Levin explains how a scrub backup like Devean George could possibly hold up a marquee trade and why Keith Van Horn is allowed to "un-retire" to collect a paycheck.

* A few months back I wrote about the NFL being the Teflon League, as Roger Goodell seems immune to any criticism. While baseball gets called to Congress for steroid hearings and the NBA has the rep of a league of thugs, football - which probably has a much bigger drug problem than baseball and has just as much lawlessness as basketball - gets a pass.
This is continuing with the Patriots cheating scandal. (I refuse to call it Spygate, by the way. Is there anything less clever than continuing to use the suffix of a hotel to name all scandals? If I owned The Watergate, I'd want royalties every time some lazy hack decided to use the -gate ending any time something nefarious went down. -- (Rob points out that when Freddy Quimby allegedly roughed up a waiter after he wouldn't say "chowder", Kent Brockman wanted to call the ensuing controversy "Waitergate", but his producers rejected the nickname. And, as we all know, that was pretty damn clever. -- Chaz.)
Today, The New York Times reports that Bill Belichick has been cheating since 2000, an admission that jibes with his report that he'd been taping since he was in the league, but seems to contradict the fact that the Patriots only gave Goodell a few tapes worth of film in September. I mean, wouldn't you think that seven years of taping would produce more than a handful of tapes? It's great that Roger Goodell is so trustworthy of admitted cheaters, but come on. For real?
Don Banks says the cheating scandal is over in the eyes of the NFL and; why wouldn't it be? You think the NFL really wants to find out that the Pats cheating was more widespread than they admitted? Doesn't it seem awfully convenient that the NFL only requested that the Pats identify their own mistakes and then took their word at face value?? Then, after all the "evidence" was turned in, Goodell subsequently had the tapes destroyed with nobody publicly discussing the possibility that this was part of a massive cover-up operation?
Look at it like this: Mangini turned in the Patriots and they were exposed as cheaters. Goodell asked the Patriots whether they were cheaters and they said, "yeah, kind of, here's all the evidence we have, swear to Tom!" And then Goodell says, "great, problem solved!"
Do you realize how ridiculous that is? It'd be like a guy going to court on embezzlement charges, admitting to one or two minor infractions and the judge saying, "sounds good, let's throw out the other 500 counts against you that you say you didn't do. I believe you, because you copped to two others. What reason would you have to lie about the other 498?! You're free to go after paying a small fine. Recess, bitches! (Pounds gavel.)"
There's no reason to assume the Pats innocence, because they (and Goodell) have done nothing to prove it. Leaving an investigation into major allegations up to the accused is as backwards as it gets. But, again, nobody seems to care.

* It looks like the NFL isn't going to change the "timeout immediately before field goals" rule, despite a general dislike of said rule by, oh, everybody. When asked why the league wouldn't change a rule that was universally reviled, Jeff Fisher, co-chairman of the NFL's rules committee said, "we can't legislate when you can call timeouts and when you can't call timeouts."
Ummm, yes you can. And, yes you do. You can't call a timeout in the middle of a play. You can't call back-to-back timeouts. You can't call a timeout if you've already taken three timeouts that half. There are many rules dictating when to take timeouts, Jeff Fisher. Furthermore, we're talking about changing something in the NFL rulebook not the freakin' U.S. Constitution. Of course you can change it. Football has the most contrived rules of any sport! Ten yards and four plays for a first down, kickoffs from the 30, no receiver contact after five yards, punting, kicking, I could go on all day, baby. Every rule is legislated. In the NFL, it's done frequently. Rules protecting the passer and receivers, late hits, interpretations of holding - all that has drastically changed in the past 20 years. Why? Because the NFL can legislate anything it wants.
Fisher makes a good point when he says that if making a rule that a coach can't call timeout with under ten seconds on the play clock isn't fair because it stops them from calling a timeout if there are too many players on the field, for instance. That's great, and all, but who says you have to make the rule a ten second cutoff? Instead, make a rule that says coaches can call timeouts, but if the timeout is not recognized by the head referee before the ball is snapped, the timeout will not be granted. Or make a rule that coaches can't call timeouts. Or do something. There's a dozen ways to write-up the rule so that it works. The worst part of last season was watching a last-second field goal attempt and then waiting to see if the play was going to count. This is a game for the fans, not for the players or coaches. (Debate that if you want, but take the fans away and those players and coaches don't get paid.)
By the way, does anybody else find it ridiculous that a current head coach is co-chair of the rules committee? I understand that you want to have "football people" in that role, but aren't there plenty of ex-coaches or players who could do the job and wouldn't have a conflict of interest like, say, the head coach of a current team. What, you're telling me that Jeff Fisher doesn't want to approve a rule that hamstrings his ability to call timeouts???!!! I'm shocked! (I like Jeff Fisher, I'm just saying that his position as co-chair is an extreme conflict of interest.)

* The Disneyfication on New York City continues: All 72 Off-track betting locations in the city are scheduled to close by June. I've never been in an NYC OTB, yet it feels like a part of me is dying along with this church. Or that might just be a line from Die Hard 2.

* Here's the fantastic video for the song "Skate With Me" by L.A. producer Dgenetics. I'm pretty sure I'd still think this was awesome even if Dgenetics and I haven't been friends since we came out of the womb. (His head was more like a Walkman then.)

DGENERATE NATION - Skate With Me from DGENETICS on Vimeo.

Even With Courtside Seats, NBA Games Are Still Pretty Boring

About a month ago, a group of my friends took advantage of the day off for Martin Luther King's birthday and decided to catch the Mavs/Bullets matinee at the Verizon Center. My buddy Russ took some pictures that I meant to post the day of the game, but something happened that afternoon with the Redskins coaching search and I became blinded with rage and never ended up posting the entry and pictures. So, here it is.
Before we get to those, the backstory: I've had some pretty good seats at sporting events before: 50-yard line 12 rows up for the lone playoff game at FedEx Field, similar seats at the pivotal Wake Forest/Maryland football game in College Park back in '06, a few rows behind a basket at various NCAA first round games, a front-row, birdseye view of Josh Howard calling a crippling timeout at Cole Field House during MD's undefeated home season in their National Championship year and nice vantage points during countless golf tournaments. Based on seating location alone, though, the tickets we had for that afternoon were definitely the best seats I've ever sat in at a major sporting event.
It had been about three years since I'd been to a Bullets game; maybe even more. The decent tickets are too damn expensive and the cheap ones are so high up in the air you feel like you're violating D.C.'s building-height restriction law just by sitting there. They're not so terrible if you're parallel to the sidelines, but are absolutely brutal if you get stuck behind the basket. It's disorienting and confusing and almost impossible to tell players apart. I sat there for the ACC Tournament in '05 after buying a cheap ticket from a guy on the street and it was tough for me to identify the players on Wake Forest. Plus those steps are dangerous if you've been imbibing. But I digress.
My friends and I decided to get cheap tickets to the game and sit in the bleeders, figuring it would be a good thing to do on a day off . We got the tickets - $12 a piece - and waited. Then on the Friday morning before the game, my dad calls me up and tells me he got two tickets for the upcoming game and asks whether I want them. After enjoying the irony involved in my dad offering me tickets for the first pro basketball game I've purchased tickets to in the past five years, I said yes, figuring his tickets were going to be a lot better than mine. (Not that that's saying much, as few tickets would have been as crappy as the ones we purchased.). I didn't realize just how good my dad's tickets were until I picked them though.
Section 100. Row AA. In other words, Giddy Up.
The seats were directly at halfcourt. We were sitting on the player's side, behind the single-row media table where the TV announcers, backup official, scoreboard operator, PA announcer, replay technican and random bald man whose job I could not ascertain.
Below are some pictures Russ and I took during the game. I'll avoid the standard cliches about how fast the game is up close and how tall DaSagna Diop looks when you're standing two feet from him and how weird Dirk Nowitzki really looks but, rest assured, all those things are true.
Thanks for the tickets, Dad.

These intros where you turn down the lights, pump in the loud, bass-thumping music and announce the players like they're the Beatles on Ed Sullivan have gotten very stale. I understand that they do it for the crowd (mainly the kids), but most of the players, coaches and fans seem bored by the whole thing. These teams are worth hundreds of millions of dollars. Somebody on the payroll has to have an idea about how to change up this passe tradition.

I thought that discovering Eddie Jones still plays in the NBA would be my biggest shock of the day. But then I saw Juwan Howard sitting at the end of the Mavs bench and a $9.50 beer in a span of 45-seconds and all was forgotten about the former Temple star.

You always see players making their way down press row before the game, sometimes stopping to put powder on their hands or give dap to the play-by-play announcer. On the Bullets though, each of the starting five begins at the start of their bench and goes down the list, giving dap to everyone sitting between Phil Chenier and the PA guy. It seems like a solid routine. Antonio Daniels even went back for some missed-dap and had to wait for Bullets PBP guy Dave Johnson to finish his sentence before Johnson gave the dap that he had missed the first time around. It appeared Daniels wasn't going to go on the floor Dapless from Dave.

Tip-off. It's amazing how bad the refs are at throwing the ball straight in the air. This is why I'm a reluctant fan of the alternate possession rule in college. Giving refs less responsibility is a good thing. You know, because they all suck.

Avery Johnson is loud. Really, really loud. That, combined with his distinct, preacher-like voice, makes hearing him yell, "DIOP.... DIOP!!! POST!" all the more entertaining.

The new HD scoreboard is large. On nights that the Verizon Center is empty, they should charge people $5 to come in and watch TV. I'd definitely go down there to watch The Departed American Idol. (Am I finally using the strikethrough correctly, Jaf?)

Former Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld had worse seats than we did. Granted, my approval rating is higher than his.

The bottle of "Rosin Material" gets a prominent spot on the scorer's table.

That's the best picture I could take of the courtside DVR system. From what I could gather, there is a guy who operates the DVR during the game, looking for timing errors, whether a shot was a three-pointer or not, etc. I wanted to steal it. Russ talked me out of it. FYI, the previous two pictures were the only two I took during the game. Clearly, you can tell how interested I was in the basketball.

Two close-ups of Josh Howard's new tattoo honoring his late college coach Skip Prosser.

A pre-injury Caron Butler looking pensive. He's probably thinking about how great Project Runway would look on that huge screen. Oh wait, that was just me.

Me walking to get some more beers. I'm including this for three reasons: 1) To show our proximity to the court. 2) To demonstrate my disdain for the art of ironing. 3) To point out how much of a doofus the Mavs radio announcer looks like.

I know what you're thinking and, no. The girls behind us weren't very cute.

I Give Him Four Days Before His First DUI

(Picture courtesy of The Washington Times)

Just when you thought Washington Nationals GM Jim Bowden couldn't be anymore of a douchebag, he goes out and wows you by riding around on a Nationals-festooned Segway. What a dope. (At least it reminds me of one of my favorite lines ever to appear in The Onion. It's the one at the top.)

Coach K Is The Pot, Roy Williams Is The Kettl

Roy Williams is upset with Mike Krzyzewski after Coach K took a dig at UNC during a post-game press conference following Duke's loss to Wake Forest. The hypocrite, and three-time national champion, didn't criticize North Carolina by name, but the AP reports:

Krzyzewski's comment came in a radio interview after Duke's loss at Wake Forest. While noting that freshman Nolan Smith had been playing through a knee injury for a few weeks, Krzyzewski added, "unlike other schools we don't release our injuries," according to the Web site for radio station WRBZ-AM in Raleigh.
The next day, Williams said on his weekly radio show: "Regardless of what somebody else says about they have injuries too, which is a bunch of bunk, so I don't give a crap what somebody else says, but coach their own damn team, I'll coach my team -- in case anybody has heard some statements about that."

Coach K was clearly taking a shot at Williams in his usual conniving, fully-deniable way. He makes the same smarmy, read-between-the-lines comments about officials and other players all the time, but never gets called on it because of his resume and penchant for holding a grudge against media members who dare besmirch his name. Like many of his players, Coach K wants it both ways. He puts himself on a pedestal of honor and class and expects to be deified for it, but is also a sideline-tyrant towards officials and opposing players. He's a walking contradiction. Although, I can see his point in this instance because it's not like he's ever used injuries as an excuse for his team's poor play.

November 1, 2007: "What we’ve tried to do as a staff is study the game and study how we want to play it for the last two summers. Some of the things we would liked to have done last year, we couldn’t do because of injuries." (Note: By "last year" Coach K is referring to the season when Duke went 8-8 in the ACC and lost in the first round of the NCAA Tournament.)

January 19, 2006: "I’m proud of Sean Dockery too because on Monday we didn’t know if Sean was going to be able to play. He hurt his foot, and we were a little bit worried that it was going to be serious. It wasn’t as serious, but he played hurt tonight, and you wouldn’t know it. We don’t like to publicize our injuries, but once it’s done, I want to give a purple heart for it -- a basketball purple heart, let’s not confuse the two."

March 14, 2004: "I am concerned a little bit about our injuries. Daniel (Ewing) hurt his hand and Chris (Duhon) after running into that camera. We will know a little more about them tomorrow. We're just anxious to see where we are going to go and who we're going to play."

1995: A back injury forces Krzyzewski to leave the Duke bench after the 12th game of the '94-95 season. The Dukies, it should be noted, would go on to finish 2-14 in the ACC.

It took me about two minutes to find those quotes. I'm sure if you spent a little time searching, you'd be able to find a lot more. The irony of it all is that Coach K used to complain about Dean Smith when the ex-UNC coach would pull the exact same crap. It's not easy being a hypocrite, I guess.

LD Williams Needs No Cape!

Early in the second half of Sunday's game against Duke, Chris' Sports Blog fav LD Williams threw down a ridiculously nasty dunk off an Ish Smith alley-oop. When I'm watching games alone (as I did this game), I'm usually pretty quiet unless I'm yelling at the refs. But after watching this dunk, I'm pretty sure I let a loud holler. I let out a few more on the next possession when LD stepped back behind the arc and drilled a three to put Wake up by six. It was the sort of shot that shouldn't have been taken - he's not a great long-range shooter, there was still plenty of time on the shot clock - but LD can get away with that impulsiveness because he does it so rarely, unlike, say, a Trent Strickland or Greivis Vazquez. And, more often than not, he succeeds. (I can't decide whether LD gets or gets deducted bonus points because he did the DeShawn Stevenson "I Can't Feel My Face" move after the three. On one hand, I like the fact that he's using a move popularized by a player on the Bullets. On the other hand, it's a pretty lame move.)
Anyway, I thought this shot was pretty great. Click on the picture to appreciate the all of its high-resolution goodness. Thanks to Craig for sending it over. You can see the dunk and the subsequent three below.

Deacon Delight

Last night I sent the following text to three of my college buddies:

i'm telling everyone at the bar that wake is going to beat duke tomorrow. the last time i made such an absurd declaration whilst drinking, the skins lost by 45 the next day

The Wolfman wrote me back and said, "i know. i have a good feeling too." Scott agreed. Call it a woman's intuition, but tonight the Deacs proved us right as they scored an 86-73 upset of #2 Duke. Fantastic.
Wake is now 6-5 in the ACC and 16-8 overall. Everyone has been trying to figure out who the fifth ACC team to get into the Tournament will be (assuming Duke, Carolina, Maryland and Clemson make it); for today, at least, the Wake Forest Demon Deacons appear to have a puncher's chance. Unbelievable for the youngest team in the conference playing for a new coach in tragic circumstances.
The lede to the Wake victory will probably be that all five Duke starters fouled out of the game. This will suggest that Wake got some favorable calls when, in actuality, more 50/50 calls went against the Deacs, including a baffling intentional foul whistle against Chas McFarland that seemed to sap Wake of their energy.
Wake built up five-point leads a few times in the game, only to watch Duke storm back with a quick run. Watching them hang tough and keep their cool was quite impressive. Even if they had lost, you could see the team was growing up. James Johnson (24 and 16 tonight) and Jeff Teague are going to be All-ACC performers in the near future, Jamie Skeen was a force in the middle and L.D. Williams - oh how I love me some L.D.
There's still a lot of basketball left to be played but, no matter what happens over the next three weeks, Wake Forest's basketball season will be a success. Now we just need to see whether or not they can turn it into a fairy tale.

Update: Everyone seems delighted with the fact that all five Duke's starters fouled out of tonight's game. Mad propers to Awful Anncouncing for the screen shot
The opposite of mad propers to the D.C. Comcast station for not airing this game in HD, despite its availability. This pic is clearly taken from an HD feed; likely one in the D.C. area. So why did they have HD and we didn't? I'm mad. Anyway, the "the refs are making up for years of Duke bias in one night" jokes are out and about, but they're wrong. The McFarland intentional foul and two non-calls under the Wake hoop early in the first half were egregious. The Dukies fouled out because they were too dumb to send in somebody else to commit the game-extending fouls.

Caron Butler's Second Chance

Today's Washington Post included a fantastic A1 story by Michael Lee about Washington Bullets Wizards All-Star Caron Butler. As has been well-chronicled, Butler spent nine months in prison during his teenage years, devoted himself to basketball upon his release and has been an active member of the community in both his hometown of Racine, WI and in the D.C. area. Lee writes of Butler's troubled teenage years and details how a pragmatic police detective gave Butler the benefit of the doubt in a case following his arrest. Had the cop not believed in Butler's intention to staying out of the drug game, it's unlikely he'd be in the NBA today. A great story. Read the whole thing.

Send It In, JEROME!

If I was a 1980's rapper, I'd say that Dwight Howard's Superman dunk was crazy, silly fresh. However, I'll contend that his behind the backboard jam was the single nastiest dunk since Vinsanity brought down the house in 2000. Seriously, watch where Howard's head is when he dunks. It's about rim-high and behind the backboard. Normally I think Kobe is a big fake, but his "ohhhhhhhhhh dammmmmmn!" reaction after the Howard dunk looked completely genuine. You can see the aforementioned dunk about one minute into the video below.

(Also, after putting that title on this entry, I had to go look up Bill Raftery's classic line on YouTube. Bill Raftery's the best. I feel that CBS should pair him with Gus Johnson for the Tournament.)

The Other Four: Wojo, Wojo's House, Wojo's Office and NBDL Headquarters

Every week, Sports Illustrated runs a feature called "The Pop Culture Grid" where four athletes are asked random entertainment questions like, "Who's Your Dream Date" or "Do you know the Soulja Boy?" One of this week's questions is "Who would you want in your Five?", a reference to the T-Mobile feature that allows subscribers to make unlimited calls to five people of their choosing (the Dwayne Wade-Charles Barkley ads are for "The Five").
One of this week's respondents is Duke freshman Kyle Singler. His answer to the "who do you want in your Five?" question? Dickie V. I'm serious.

Valentine's Day Greetings

On the most special of all made-up holidays, I was able to intercept some Valentine's Day messages written by a number of sports figures.

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

To: Adam Vinatieri
From: Bill Belichick, Tom Brady & The Entire New England Patriots family

Without you, we'd be the Buffalo Bills.

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

To: Playing Time
From: J.J. Redick

Playing time, oh playing time
wherefore art thou playing time?

Taken in the draft's first round,
was a man of great renown.
My J was pure, my hair like Ceaser,
now I'm benched like I'm a geezer.

I still have my shit-eating grin,
and some say I'm a young Whitman.
My poems flow like running waters,
too bad my game's like someone's daughter's.

It's quite rare that I see the floor,
my teammates; we have no rapport.
My coach no longer sweats my game,
I think he might not know my name.

Coach K thinks now that I'm a pest,
perhaps that's due to my arrest
for driving whilst intoxicated.
Why, oh why, am I still hated?

It's not like I am worth your scorn.
Your boos do make me quite forlorn.
I wish I could go back to school,
like Rodney D, boy, that would rule.

My pro career has been pure folly,
I play less ball than Kevin Ollie.
Fans no longer call my name,
I miss my brush with minor fame.

Orlando sucks, I hate the heat.
The girls here; hot, not fully beat
like broads at Duke, I miss those chicks,
and also Melchionni's - HEY!

The coach just waved... I'm going in!
my pro career can now begin!!!
What's that - you wanted Garrity?
Screw this, I'm callin' Dickie V.


YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

To: Daniel Snyder
From: Ernest Byner

After you completely screwed me over this week, I'd like to tell you off. But I'm far too classy to say what I really think.

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

To: Daniel Snyder
From: Me

Luckily, I'm not. Here's a Valentine's Day poem for you, Danny Boy:

Roses are red,
violets are blue,
you may be rich,
but you're still a short, egomaniacal prick who will someday learn that money can buy a lot of things, but it can't buy respect, decency or love. Enjoy Jim Zorn and Stump Mitchell, asshole.

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

To: Coach K
From: ACC referees

Just wanted to pass along a quick note to tell you how much we love you, Mike. We were all just reminiscing about the night we met up at Red Lobster and you ordered snow crab because you thought they actually lived in the snow! That was a great night. You are so funny, Mike. That's what we love about you most, your humor. Your humor and the way you manipulate us like we're Kermit to your Jim Henson. Remember, if things should ever go wrong with your wife, we'll be here for you. Waiting. Longing. Hoping. Never forget that. And never forget what we do for you. The Final Four game against Maryland in 2001, the ACC Tournament win against Georgia Tech in '05, how we kept you in it against VCU for so long last year, and all those games in between. We do that all for you, Mike, not because we have to, but because we want to. Helping you win completes us.

YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

To: Roger Clemens
From: Reality

Dude, we need to talk.

The REAL Reason Clemens Is Upset With Brian McNamee

Thanks to Peter for the find

From The "No Sh*t" Department

A press release sent out by the Redskins today:

21300 Redskin Park Drive u Ashburn, VA 20147 u 703-726-7000

www.redskins.com

PRESS RELEASE

For Immediate Release

February 13, 2008

NO INCREASE IN REDSKINS TICKET PRICES FOR 2008 SEASON

New On-Line Ticket Management System Unveiled

ASHBURN, VA -- General admission ticket prices for Washington Redskins games will remain unchanged for the 2008 season, the team announced today and, for the first time season ticket holders will be able to access and manage their accounts through a new channel at www.redskins.com.

"We work hard to minimize ticket increases, and we've been able to maintain the current level for yet another year," said Mitch Gershman, Redskins Chief Operating Officer. "The stability of pricing and the more than 200,000 names on our wait list for season tickets are testament to the continued support of our tremendous fan base, and we thank them."

The team’s new “My Season Ticket Account” link will allow ticketholders to directly maintain their accounts, including paying for their tickets in a direct, secure manner, and updating contact information in real time.

Every season ticketholder’s invoice will contain a password which may be used to access their account in conjunction with the account number or e-mail address. Passwords may be changed following initial activation. The mailing of season tickets will begin Feb. 15, with the “My Season Ticket Account” feature active on Monday, Feb. 18.

Since 1999, the team has increased ticket prices only twice (2000 and 2006), a rarity among U.S. sports franchises. General admission tickets currently range in price from $29 to $99. The team's season tickets have been sold out since the mid-1960s.

That's More Like It

Of all the ridiculous things said during, and in the aftermath, of the Redskins coaching search (including Jim Fassel blaming his current situation on bloggers), this might be my all-time favorite: Sherman Smith, the only candidate to fill Jim Zorn's recently-vacated offensive coordinator slot, told The Washington Times:

"I think it's mine to turn down. But I need to go up there and see if the time is right. It boils down to asking the question, 'Do I want to be a coordinator?' So much is overblown about the coordinator's position. It's not like the [Titans'] coordinator goes up on a mountaintop and comes down and gives us a plan. We all worked together to put the plan in, so it is not one guy doing the planning and the rest of us nodding our heads. We all worked together."

For real, dawg? That's really what you want to say as a new employer ponders giving you a huge promotion and a huge raise? Maybe he is playing coy because he's not sure if going to the dysfunctional Redskins is a good fit, but still... It's not exactly like the NFL has been beating down Sherman Smith's door to give him a coordinator position, now the guy wants to act as if he's as in-demand as George Clooney? (George Clooney?!) Or that the position of offensive coordinator really isn't all that difficult?! Can you imagine walking into a job interview and badmouthing the very job you're interviewing for? You'd be laughed out the room. If Smith is really this stupid, Snyder would be wise to take the job off the table immediately. As it is, I fully expect him to be hired by this afternoon.

You Think You Know Someone And Then - BAM! - You Find Out You Do

ESPN: Indiana Faces Major Violations Over Calls
Me: I (Don't) Wanna Talk To Sampson - 3/31/06

I'm shocked and appalled to learn that IU basketball coach Kelvin Sampson would resort to cheating in order to gain an upper-hand in the Big Ten. I'm also shocked and appalled that the nice Nigerian man who emailed me asking for help moving money and goods from his country did not reimburse me for the $500 I sent him, nor did he send me a check for a percentage of the gross profits.

Fail, Do The Redskins

Maryland, Virginia and Washington D.C. are holding their primary elections today. To celebrate the first ever "Potomac Primary", Redskins owner Daniel Snyder is acting quite presidential as he attempts to distract the masses from his ridiculous coaching hire by leaking some offseason plans to the press.
Remember back in 1998 when it seemed that the U.S. would bomb countries every time the Monica Lewinsky scandal got bigger? A four-day bombing campaign of Iraq began suddenly when Congress was conducting impeachment hearings of Bill Clinton. Some observers questioned the timing of the strikes, clearly insinuating that the president was attempting to get his trials off the front page. Earlier that year, bombing strikes on Sudan and Afghanistan coincided with Clinton's infamous "it depends what the definition of 'is' is" testimony before a grand jury. (Interestingly, those were the bombings that caused Sudan to expel Osama bin Laden, setting the U.S. on a crash course for 9/11, according to the gripping, Pulitzer Prize-winning tome The Looming Tower.)
Despite frequent donations to Republican candidates (ones that tend to lose, keeping with Snyder's M.O.), the Redskins owner channeled his inner-Clinton yesterday by leaking the team's intentions to pursue Chad Johnson, Lance Briggs and Trent Dilfer this offseason. Forget that the Redskins are $16 million over the cap and need to restructure a slew of contracts before they can even consider overpaying Ocho Cinco. (Pesky details don't matter to Danny and Vinny!) If they want Chad Johnson then, dammit, they're going to send two first-round picks and Clinton Portis to Cincinnati so they can GET Chad Johnson! I hate this team.
Today's Washington Post offered a position-by-position breakdown of what the Redskins plan to do this offseason. It is, as you'd imagine, completely ludicrous. Johnson, one source said, can be had for "a low first-round and a third-round pick, or perhaps two second-round picks." FYI, Randy Moss, who just set the NFL record for TD receptions in season, was acquired for a fourth-round pick last year. And the Pats also got Wes Welker, the best player on the field in the Super Bowl, for a second and seventh-round pick. Read this paragraph again. I beg you.
The article goes on to say that Ladell Betts will resume his duties as a kickoff returner, but will serve strictly as a backup to Clinton Portis. Joe Gibbs thought Betts and Portis should be used in tandem, but Dinny doesn't think so. I agree with Danny and Vinny because, clearly, they know a lot more about football than JOE GIBBS.
On the o-line front, coaching candidates expressed concern about Jon Jansen's injuries, but were told that releasing him was impossible because of cap ramifications, to which I say, "WHAT?!" It's one thing to have constant knee problems, or a hamstring that never seems to heal (paging Santana Moss). But Jansen has suffered two fluke pile-related injuries in four years. That's not the sign of an injury-prone man, it's the sign of an unlucky dude. Jansen broke his leg last year because somebody fell on it in a weird way. Yeah, let's cut him because there's so much depth at his position. Morons. (And why is the front office even listening to guys they deemed unhireable? Furthermore, did these candidates even know HOW Jansen gt injured those two years, or did they just assume his absence was the result of a chronic problem? If the other candidates did their homework like Jim "Maroon & Black" Zorn, I'd bet on the former.)
This paragraph slayed me too:

Offensive line coach Joe Bugel has expressed some concern about Lorenzo Alexander's modest wingspan, team sources said, but he showed considerable promise last season and could help solidify the line.

I'm an Alexander fan, so I hope he works out. But read between the lines of this paragraph. What I get out of it is that Bugel thinks Alexander isn't a viable every-down NFL lineman, but the front office disagrees. So, again, football-lifer and offensive line guru says "no", Vinny Cerrato says "yes". Guess who Snyder listens to. Unbelievable.
I'm going to ignore the part about Philip Daniels moving to defensive tackle and chalk that up a typo or something. Or maybe that guy from The Wire who makes the stories up finally got a job at The Post and ghostwrote this article for Jason La Canfora. Because Daniels gets manhandled when he lines up at end, can you imagine how badly he'd get worked if he was playing against 340-pound behemoths in the middle? I give up.
Didn't we go through this Lance Briggs dance last year too? Let's call it early; 5 years, $40 million, $18 mil to sign, cut on May 31, 2010.
The defensive backs section talks about Carlos Rogers' slow rehab (I'm assuming this is due to the fact that he can't hold onto any of the equipment) and Greg Blache's desire to re-sign Shawn Springs. Frankly, I think Springs' price-tag will be too high, but I fully anticipate Cerrato trying to lure Asante Samuel into town with a $200 million deal and a lifetime pass to Six Flags.
At the end, the coup de grace:

Punter Derrick Frost had a strong first half, then tapered off and team sources said they expect special teams coach Danny Smith to bring at least one veteran into training camp for competition. Place kicker Shaun Suisham is also still developing and missed a critical field goal in the playoff loss to Seattle, but has strong support and is seen as someone who could provide stability at a position of great turnover in recent years.

A STRONG FIRST HALF? In what universe did Derrick Frost have a strong first half. That's like saying that Rudy Guiliani's campaign had a strong January. Frost is the worst punter I saw this year. He hits 60 yard punts when he needs a 40 yarder and 20 yard punts when he needs a 60 yarder. He can't pin teams deep and can't directionally punt. On the rare occasions that he does boom one, the hang time is so short that the Redskins' special teams are hopelessly out of position to make a play. Frost needed to go, like, last year. As for Suisham: HE MISSED A 30 YARD FIELD GOAL IN THE PLAYOFF GAME THAT WOULD HAVE PUT THE REDSKINS UP BY FOUR POINTS, A MISS WHICH CHANGED THE MOMENTUM OF THE ENTIRE GAME. And the worst part is, nobody was surprised by the miss. That's not the sign of a developing kicker, it's the sign of a shitty one. Ugh, it's February 12 and I'm already worked up. Thanks, Dinny. Thanks a lot.

I Guess They Ended Up Moving To Overratedville

Long Live The Maroon & Black

During his introductory press conference today, new Washington coach Jim Zorn referred to the team colors as maroon and black. The Redskins, as everyone knows, wear burgundy and gold. Look, nobody expects Zorn to be able to name all The Hogs, recite the scores from each of the team's 17 wins in 1991 or sing all the verses to 'Hail to the Redskins'. But you've gotta know the colors. Come on now.

NFL Quarterbacks Don't Make Good NFL Head Coaches

Dan Snyder is introducing his new head coach right now, but I had to flip off the channel because listening to that Napoleonic-schmuck speak makes me nauseous. The mere sight of him makes me cringe. He nearly ruined the Art Monk and Darrell Green's Hall of Fame press conference last week when the NFL Network cameras panned to him sitting in the crowd with an air of douchebaggery emanating from his self-satisfied smirk.
I'd flip back to listen to Zorn, but we've heard it all before. "I'm excited about this opportunity." "I want to add another trophy to the case here at Redskins Park." "It's going to take hard work, but I know we're all prepared for that." Yada, yada, yada.
Instead, I was struck by a thought: There has never been an NFL quarterback who has gone on to become a great NFL head coach. I could be missing somebody, but I scanned the list of coaches with over 50 NFL wins and couldn't find any coach on that list who had also played quarterback in the league. Of current coaches, only Sean Payton played quarterback in the NFL, and he shouldn't even count because his appearance was as a replacement player during the '87 strike. If I'm missing someone, let me know.
I believe the last NFL quarterback to coach in the NFL was also employed by the Redskins. Steve Spurrier lasted just two years on the job. There are a whole number of reasons why quarterbacks probably don't make good coaches, but that's for another day. I think it is interesting though that the last two head coaches who had sizable quarterbacking experience in the NFL both worked for Dan Snyder. It makes sense, I suppose. Snyder always wants to hang with the cool kids, and what's cooler than being a star quarterback?

Jim Zorn Built The Eiffel Tower Out of Metal... And Brawn

My buddy Antzo got mad at me earlier for being so negative about the Redskins coaching search, so I vowed to look at the bright side for a change. (Antzo was the lone person in the D.C. area to be pleased with the possibility of hiring Jim Fassel, so his blind, unwarranted team-optimism meshes well with my team-cyncicism.) As I wrote last night, I'm actually pleased with the hiring of Zorn, it's the manner in which he was hired that is problematic. Michael Wilbon writes today that it won't matter whether Zorn was the first, second, fifth or sixth choice if he provides results, and I agree. But I'm not a patient person and this isn't 1954. It's the internet age, sucka. We demand instant analysis. So instead of waiting around until November to decide whether or not this was a good hire, I decided to look deeper into the life of Jim Zorn. And by "deeper" I mean getting about four pages deep in a "Jim Zorn" search on Google. This research has led me to believe that Jim Zorn will be a success in Washington; not necessarily because of his coaching, but for different reasons altogetherl

#1) If the coaching thing doesn't work out, Zorn and Steve Largent can get work acting in ads for Wrangler Jeans.


2) Zorn's initials allow for the easy nickname of "JZ". The rapper Jay-Z doesn't have much in common with the coach JZ, other than a shared stint slinging crack in the Marcy Projects. However, think of all the fun that can be had with the JZ moniker: When the Redskins are playing well we can write "JZ has the Redskins "Big' Pimpin'" or "There ain't no love in the heart of New York City, as JZ and the 'Skins rolled through the Giants." Of course, when the 'Skins are playing poorly, the "99 Problems" and "Hard Knock Life" cracks will be all too easy to make. But, hey, you can't knock the hustle. (We'll also conveniently ignore the fact that Jay-Z failed miserably when he was promoted to CEO of Def Jam records.)


3) An interview with Zorn appeared on the Seahawks website last year. One of the questions was, "Favorite hobby to do outside of sports?" Zorn's response, "anything that has to do with going hard and getting sweaty." Moving on...

4) Below is a picture of Mr. Redskin Vinny Cerrato. Man, I wish this was a Photoshop job. Sadly, it's real:

And now, a picture of new head coach Jim Zorn:

So, let me ask you... Isn't Jim Zorn just a better-looking, less-creepy version of Vinny Cerrato?
I know, I know... That's not necessarily a good thing. On second thought, I guess that's not a good thing at all. At least it shows why Cerrato was so smitten with Zorn after knowing him for just 48 hours.

5) Zorn went to college at Cal-Poly Ponoma, a school founded after a donation of land from W.K. Kellogg of Kellogg's cereal.

6) He's not Jim Fassel.

Jim Zorn Named Redskins Head Coach


After 32 days, the Washington Redskins have finally completed their coaching search. Reluctant to hire Gregg Williams, Al Saunders, Steve Mariucci and Jim Fassel, spurned by Bill Cowher, Pete Carroll and Steve Spagnuolo, Daniel Snyder and Vinny Cerrato eventually settled on the man they hired to be their offensive coordinator two weeks ago, former Seattle quarterbacks coach Jim Zorn. I really don't know what to say. Wow.
Considering the alternatives available at the moment (Fassel), I suppose Zorn isn't that bad of a hire. (Granted, he's never been on anybody's coaching radar, but neither was Joe Gibbs in 1981.) However, looking back on the entirety of the coaching search, the "promotion" of Zorn looks absurd. Did Dinny really let Gregg Williams go so they could hire a guy who's never been anything more than a quarterbacks coach in the NFL? If they really wanted Zorn to run their offense, why not just make Williams the head coach and assign Zorn as OC? Oh, because that might have made too much sense.
The only logical explanation for why Zorn was hired tonight is that no other man, woman or inanimate object wanted to work for Dinny (other than Gregg Williams). Spagnuolo couldn't get out of D.C. quick enough; he left Snyder's house at 1 a.m. the other night to get back to New York. Cowher didn't even interview. I fear we'll never know the real reason Jim Fassel was passed over, but I assume Snyder feared the public backlash would translate into a hit on his wallet.
Had Zorn been hired two weeks ago, maybe that would have made a little sense. He'd have been the unknown hire, the guy Redskins fans would hope was the next great coach who toiled in anonymity before making it big. But to do it like this was a complete debacle. Maybe Dinny knows something we don't, though. In his two weeks as offensive coordinator, perhaps Zorn learned the subtle nuances of NFL football.
Look, it's not that I'm all that upset that the 'Skins hired Jim Zorn. I'm hopeful that he will continue the good work that Joe Gibbs began here. Unlike a Jim Fassel or a Denny Green, there's no reason to instantly dismiss Zorn's abilities, mainly because he's never had a chance to demonstrate them.
Maybe the Jim Zorn hire will be the best coaching move the Washington Redskins could have made following Joe Gibbs' resignation. Maybe; but with Snyder and Cerrato making personnel decisions, it doesn't much matter.

Update: An awesome back-handed compliment by Jason Reid in his article about the hire in The Washington Post: "Zorn developed a good reputation as a tutor of quarterbacks while as a position coach with the Seattle Seahawks." That's great, guys. Your new head coach is a good tutor of quarterbacks.
Update #2: From Jason La Canfora's blog: "[Zorn] spent a lot of time with Vinny Cerrato and Dan Snyder in the past two days, team sources said, and the brass - Cerrato in particular - "fell in love with him." Anybody else get the sense that 3-card Monte dealers on the street make a lot of money whenever Vinny Cerrato walks by?
Update #3: Let's take a minute to appreciate the timing of this announcement. Knowing that they're the laughingstock of the league, Dinny waits until 7:00 on a Saturday night to announce that Zorn got the job. You can always count on Dan Snyder for one thing: Subtlety.
Update #4: OK, I'm not anti-Zorn. Of all the names bandied about in recent weeks, Zorn provides more optimism than the tired retreads like Fassel or Mariucci. However, Zorn is 54. That's not at all old for a first-time head coach, but it is old for a quarterbacks coach who has never had a more-important coaching job. If Zorn had spent the last seven years as Seattle's offensive coordinator, 54 would be a perfect age. But doesn't it say a little something that he's a 54 year old man who has never had a job title higher than quarterbacks coach? I think it has to. Vinny Cerrato apparently does not.

As Long As They're Hiring Losers, I Hear Romney and Edwards Are Available


From Jason La Canfora's Redskins Insider blog at washingtonpost.com:

League soruces said that [John] Palermo, a longtime college coach with strong ties to Vinny Cerrato, signed a contract today to become the Redskins' defensive line coach. Palermo was most recently retired after spending 2007 season with Tenn. Tech. He has never coached in the NFL.

I - I'm - I don't know what to say anymore. Really, I don't. It's one thing to be a dysfunctional organization nobody wants to work for. It's a whole other thing to resort to hiring your unqualified "general manager"'s boy, who himself is unqualified, because nobody wants to come work for your dysfunctional organization.
Palermo worked for Tennessee Tech last year! Not Georgia Tech. Not Virginia Tech (I know this because he has no rap sheet). Not Lincoln Tech! Palermo coached at Tennessee Tech, a team that went 4-7 and gave up 30, 45, 38, 59, 35 and 38 points in their last six games, respectively. And now he's qualified to come in and teach Kedric Golston and Anthony Montgomery to get to the quarterback? As Rob texted me last night, "I'm struggling to maintain my loyalty."

This Post Will Be Outdated By Noon Friday, When Jim Fassel Will Inevitably Be Named Redskins Head Coach And This Site Will Temporarily Explode With Anger, Vitrol, Rage And Maybe Some Patron Silver

* It's the single-best annual Internet article and it's just been put up on SI.com: Dr. Z has released his annual Announcer Grades. Couldn't agree with the Doc more in his criticisms of Jaworski, Phil Simms and Kornheiser; but I do contend that Gus Johnson and Steve Tasker are more deserving of a 1 1/2 stars and that Tony Siragusa deserves praise for nothing except that time his mic went out in the middle of that rainy game in Green Bay. Because that was awesome.
(Update: In today's Mailbag column, Dr. Z acknowledges that he was too easy on Siragusa:

Dave of Hoboken again. "Z, you're not always bright, but at least you're honest." Huh? "What's the matter with you?" says the Flaming Redhead, who came over when she heard my groans. "That says not always RIGHT!" Oh. So what was the question again? Why wasn't I tougher on Tony Siragusa, who actually detracts from the game, "because Fox seems obsessed with what he's doing ('Look, Goose is trying to stay dry because it's raining,'), etc." Wow, that was a tough one to punctuate. Yeah, you're right. I should have hit his role as part of the landscape, but frankly, at that point I was getting a little tired of that team and Goose and everything, and I was eager to get to my yearly ESPN rip.)

* It happens almost every time you read a story that includes remarks from athletes, but you hardly realize it: The cleaning up of quotes. Few athletes speak with perfect, non-regional diction. Many have accents, use slang words or colloquialisms or pepper their conversations with filler words such as "like" or "um" or, the athlete's personal favorite, "you know". Oftentimes players will speak in improper English like, "we didn't get nobody down the floor".
Yet, when you read the quotes the next day in the newspaper, they are invariably cleaned up to something like "nobody got down the floor".
(The ombudsman of The Washington Post wrote about this one day, in her usual, pedantic, holier-than-thou style. Although this one isn't as bad as most.)
I found that piece (which I sort of remember reading in June) after I've noticed something with the way Capitals superstar Alex Ovechkin gets quoted in the papers. An excerpt from the Post game story after his four-goal performance:

"Today was special day," said Ovechkin of his spectacular game. "I broke my nose, I have stitches, I score four goals. Everything go to my face. It's the fifth time I broke my nose. It's okay."

They make him sound like Drago from Rocky IV. I don't know which way is better; turning Ovechkin into Mr. Smooth American Guy or quoting him like he's a KGB operative. I prefer the latter, but would be alright with the former as long as its use was consistent throughout the media.
Peter King has found otherwise. From his intentionally-yet-unintentionally-awesome MMQB:

Quote of the Week III
"We don't really conversate.''
--The real words of New England wideout Randy Moss, on his relationship with coach Bill Belichick.

Sanitized Quote of the Week
"We don't really converse much.''
--Moss, according to the quote sheet produced by the NFL, on his relationship with Belichick.

* This headline made me laugh:

When I first saw it, I was convinced there was another Brown on the Lakers that I didn't know of. Because there was no way Pau Gasol was getting traded for Kwame Freakin' Brown. It wasn't until I read the story, that my confusion began to clear. The Lakers were dealing Brown, rookie guard Jarvis Crittenton, two first-round draft choices and some other junk for Gasol. In other words the headline should have been something like "Lakers Unload to Get Gasol". In no way was this a "Kwame for Pau" deal. I can't imagine what I would have done if I was a Grizzlies fan and had seen that headline. On second thought, I just can't imagine being a Grizzlies fan.

* Michael's Wilbon first column after his heart attack was fantastic.

* Sally Jenkins' slamming of Dan Snyder in The Washington Post has been a hot topic of conversation in the area, and while I certainly don't want to defend Snyder, Jenkins really needs to shut the hell up.
In the piece she rips on Snyder (well-deserved) but holds the Giants up to be the paragons of organizational unity when they've been one of the most dysfunctional teams in the NFL over the past three years. Remember, it wasn't that long ago when every week brought a new story out about how the Giants players were ready to revolt and that they all wanted Tom Coughlin fired. How quickly we forget.
Look, the Giants are worthy Super Bowl champions. And I wish the Redskins would look at them and realize that having a GM is what helped the Giants get in a position to win said Super Bowl. But let's not act like the Giants are all that's right with football. They played well when they needed to, got lucky when they needed to and busted Tom Brady in the mouth when they needed to. Their Super Bowl wasn't a fluke, but how they got there should hardly be a blueprint for any other team.
On top of all this, Jenkins lives and writes in New York. I don't know why that bothers me, but it does.

* The cast of Family Ties reunited yesterday morning on "The Today Show". If you have 12 minutes to kill, I highly recommend watching the clip. Seeing Michael J. Fox in his current condition is a little sad, but the way he handles himself despite his affliction is pretty inspiring. Unlike, say, Tina Yothers new hairstyle.

* The Onion has two gems this week: World Leaders Gather To Roast Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and Patriots' Season Perfect For Rest Of Nation. The Ahmadinejad one is an instant classic.

* I was all prepared to be sad about HBO's Inside the NFL getting cancelled. Then I remembered that I barely watch the show any more (and never do in weeks when the Redskins lose) and can't stand both Dan Marino and Cris Carter when they do those stupid "Player Chats" or whatever they were called. Still, I tuned in for the last 15 minutes in the show's history. I thought they'd be showing greatest moments, or best plays in the 31 years the show has been on the air, but no... They were having a pity party for Cris Carter because he didn't get into the Hall of Fame this year and Art Monk did. While Marino and Peter King and Bob Costas weren't exactly ripping on Monk, they were not-at-all-subtlely telling the viewer that Cris Carter was SO MUCH BETTER than Monk and that Monk getting in before Carter is a travesty. Since Monk is in and I've retired my Monk4Hall Bandwagon (traveling to Canton on August 2), I won't get into specifics here but, shut up Cris Carter. You'll get in at some point. Maybe you'll even get lucky and the NFL will put a little cocaine residue under the bronzed nose on your bust. You know, from the three times you tested positive for coke with the Eagles. Good thing it's only a head bust, because if they did a full-body work up, those ring-less fingers wouldn't look too good either. Art Monk has three, by the way.

* I've been waiting for the perfect time to show this video over the past few years, but that time never came... Until tonight. This young monkey perfectly captures the intense and emotional feelings that all Redskins fans have had to deal with over the past few weeks. This monkey feels our pain; he understands it. Our troubles are his troubles. And when he.... Well, I'll let you watch. But let's just say that Redskins fans and this monkey: We are one.

My buddy Jimmy Rubes and I once sat and watched this video about 50 times in a row - laughing harder with each subsequent viewing - in the Efird common room, probably at 4:45 a.m, while Redemer took up two chairs sleeping, the Wolfman was taking the fun way, Fingers was walking aimlessly through Abercrombie Kids and Scotty was takin a drive that might-or-might not end at Cookout.

Nobody Likes Me, Everybody Hates Me, Dinny's Gonna Eat Some Worms
The Redskins Coaching Search: Day 30

It's come to this: After waiting to interview Giants defensive coordinator Steve Spagnuolo for two weeks, during which time Spagnuolo turned from possibly-overrated assistant to de facto Super Bowl MVP, the Redskins have been left at the altar by their supposed bride-to-be. Reports indicate that Dinny never actually offered the head coaching job to Spagnuolo, but that's a trivial matter: The job had to be Spagnuolo's if he wanted it. I won't buy any spin that says otherwise, because it doesn't make sense. Instead, he re-upped with the Giants for $2 million per season, becoming the highest paid defensive coordinator in the game. (Although I'm not sure about that distinction, as Gregg Williams is still under contract to the Redskins for a reported $2.5 million per year.)
Spagnuolo's agent said it didn't matter that his client wasn't offered the job because, "his heart is in New York City." For the record, Spagnuolo was born and raised in Massachusetts, went to college at the state university, spent much of his professional life in Storrs, CT and Philadelphia and has been with the Giants for exactly 11 months. But, yeah, his heart is in New York City.
Now, it once again appears that Jim Fassel is the front-runner to get the Redskins job, even though the team arguably looks even worse if they hire him after bailing two weeks ago. What was a stupid hire then is still a stupid hire now. But doesn't the team appear more impotent after waiting two weeks to talk to the league's hot assistants, only to be rebuffed and forced to come crawling back to a guy who was recently rejected by the Kansas City Chiefs for their offensive coordinator position? I mean, isn't that so much more embarrassing? It's like Dinny dumped their solid, steady girlfriend (Saunders, Williams) in order to go out with a hot girl (Cowher, Carroll), got rejected, then tried to get together with a buddy's tired ex (Fassel, Mariucci) only to be talked out of it by everyone he knew. So Dinny, all dressed up with no place to go, then cast eyes on some new chicks in town (Spagnuolo, McDaniels) who also said no because they wanted to stay with their old, more stable flames. Finally, exhausted from the search and losing face by the hour, Dinny has to go back to the only person that wants them, the old reject. And the thinking is that they'll live happily ever after: A bunch of rejects who found love with the only other person who could stand them.

The Return of Dickie V

With Dick Vitale returning to television for Duke at UNC following a three-month hiatus due to throat surgery, tonight would have been the perfect time for the fourth annual "Evening With Dickie V". Sadly, though, the ESPN broadcast is blacked out in ACC country. Instead, we get the Raycom telecat with Tim Brando and Billy Packer. (This is usually doubly-awful since the Raycom feed was never in HD, but I hear rumors that they're showing this one in high def, so all is not lost.) I'm not gonna lie; even though I (deservedly) give Dickie V a lot of crap, I've kinda missed him this year. Say what you want about him - and I do - but college basketball never feels as important if Vitale isn't around.
Alright, I'm done with that. Let's hope it's a good one tonight. I'm worried that Ty Lawson's injury won't allow that though. (By the way, at the moment, I'm watching the GT/Wake game on CSTV's Gametracker. It's sort of like MLB's GameDay feature; the applet shows the ball moving around the court, its motion through the air during the shot and even long breakaway passes. It gives you a faux-sense of the game's pace and is oddly compelling. But I digress.)
Last thought: I get that the Suns are breaking up a good team by dealing Shawn Marion for Shaq. And I also understand that Shaq is an old 35 and has a lot of wear and tear on his knees and feet. But I don't get the universal derision the deal has received. You can think it's a bad move, fine. But is it really out of the realm of possibility that Shaq gets motivated and has one last spurt of domination in this year's playoffs? Hasn't Shaq always shown that he can turn it on when he wants to? Yeah, he might not have anything left in the tank, but I'm not ready to write him off just because he wasn't going all out for a brutal Miami team.

The State of the Deacs

The Super Bowl wasn't the only game that had a great finish this past Sunday. In Raleigh, North Carolina State slipped past Wake Forest on a last second put-back dunk by Ben McCauley. Dino Gaudio's Demon Deacons outplayed State for nearly the entire game, but the team's youth once again betrayed them, as Wake dropped to 1-7 on the road.
I haven't written much about the Deacs this year for a few reasons. First, they're very young; the 11th youngest team in the country (and by far the youngest team in a BSC conference). Those young players are quite talented, just good enough to lull you into thinking they're going to win a game, only to have their inexperience shine through in the final minutes. Secondly, Skip Prosser's death, and the subsequent coaching change, gives the Deacs a pass this year (which they also have because of their youth). When I write about my favorite teams, I focus on the good and on the bad. Focusing on the bad just doesn't feel right with this year's Demon Deacons. (That's why I was disgusted when everyone ripped Joe Gibbs after the (misunderstood) double timeout earlier this year. I mean, for crap's sake people, get some perspective. And if a perspective-challenged person like me is telling people to get perspective, you know they've got problems.)
Because of this, when I've watched Wake games this year I felt oddly-detached, sort of like when you watch your favorite NFL team after they've been eliminated from playoff contention. I still cared, but not in the same way. Even when the Deacs were challenging a tough Clemson team on the road two weeks back, I still wasn't as into it as usual. But, for whatever reason, that changed on Sunday when Wake was running N.C. State all over the court. I'm pretty sure I got my fire back because the refs were performing a classic ACC screwover on my beloved Deacs, but that's neither here nor there. We can still mourn the passing of Prosser and await the arrival of the Big Three in the fall, but since Gaudio's squad has proven themselves capable of hanging with most teams in the country, I can begin getting way too emotionally-invested in games once again.

1) My reawakening (pun intended) is due, nearly in full, to State F Ben McCauley. That horribly-goateed doofus was getting calls on Sunday like he was MJ circa '96. Every time he went in the paint, he got a whistle in his favor. It was ridiculous.
Refs called three ticky-tack foulds against Wake in the first 45 seconds of the second half. By the under-16 timeout, Wake had five team fouls and State had two of their own. None of those seven fouls needed to be called. As my buddy Ben (not a Wake fan, mind you) said, "it was as if the refs went in at halftime and said, 'we need to begin controlling this game with our whistles." It really was atrocious. They were calling non-existent push offs, blew whistles anticipating contact that never came and couldn't get simple out-of-bounds plays correct.
Once the police-state was established, Wake didn't do itself any favors. Jeff Teague and Chas McFarland both picked up moronic fourth fouls away from the basket, both of which put State on the line for two shots. It's bad enough when the refs screw you over by calling the game as inconsistent as (insert presidential candidate here)'s positions, but to shoot yourself in the foot by fouling a guy shooting an off-balance turnaround 16 feet from the basket is just as bad.

2) The verdict is still out on Gaudio. At this point, I like him a lot. Wake's defense is the best it's been since Josh Howard graduated and the team plays with an offensive intensity that disappeared when Chris Paul went to the NBA. However, Gaudio takes after Prosser in one troubling respect: Sitting on leads.
Last week, Wake was up six on Miami with 3:30 to go when Gaudio put the team in a quasi-Four Corners offense. It didn't work, as Miami tied the game and Wake needed an Ish Smith layup with time expiring to win. The slowdown strategy was questionable that night, as that lead and the time remaining were hardly enough to warrant taking the foot off the gas. Therefore, it's even more exceedingly stupid to go to the Four Corners when up by ONE POINT with 3:30 left in a road game. Yet, that's what Gaudio did.
Dumber still was slowing down Ish Smith, who was slicing through the Wolfpack D all afternoon with ease. Gaudio did that too, having Smith dribble at the top of the key until the shot clock wound down and then forcing passes to non-shooters. After State took the lead, Gaudio unleashed Smith yet again and, not surprisingly, he penetrated the defense for a game-tying score.

3) After Wake tied the game with 5.2 seconds left, N.C. State called a timeout to set up a play. What happened next was unlike anything I've ever seen in a college basketball game. Had this been last year, I would have put up a 500-word rant an instant after it happened. But because of my newfound zen-like attitude towards the Deacs, I just ranted for 15 minutes on the phone about it afterwards instead. But here's what happened:
State inbounded the ball to Gavin Grant with 5.2 seconds left. Grant caught the ball a few feet behind half court. Gaudio chose not to defend the player inbounding the ball, instead choosing to drop his five men back into a half court set. The problem was, as the Wake players kept backpedaling, nobody came up to defend Grant. Wake G Harvey Hale, who should have challenged Grant, kept backing up, essentially giving an open three-point look to Grant. Because he was able to freely saunter up the court and shoot unguarded, Grant released his shot with 2.6 seconds left, giving Ben McCauley plenty of time to set-up for the rebound and slam the putback through for a way-too-easy last-second win. I really didn't want to link to this, but after watching it again, the absurdity of Wake's defense is too much. Skip ahead to the :50 second mark. Awful.

4) Wake really misses L.D. Williams, not just because Williams plays good defense and is an athletic, scoring slasher, but because one of the players getting more minutes in his stead, Jamie Skeen, plays soft. Skeen missed two easy layups late in the State game, any one of which would have put the Deacs in a much better position to win.

5) The improvement of 7-footer Chas McFarland has been staggering this year.

6) It looks like do-it-all freshman James Johnson is in the midst of hitting the freshman wall. He's played major minutes all season and it might be time to give him some more time on the bench during February.

7) Harvey Hale's shooting lines from ACC play this season:

VT 1-10
BC 0-4
Maryland 1-9
FSU 4-9
Clemson 3-10
Miami 3-9
NC State 3-7

Had Hale shot better in either the Maryland or Clemson games, Wake probably would have pulled those games out. (In the MD game, in particular, it seemed like all of Hale's misses came at a point when the Deacs needed that big shot to either continue their run or stop a Maryland run.) Hale shot 39% from beyond the arc in 2007. That percentage is down to 26% this season.
And it's not like Hale is shooting contested shots. He's missing wide-open looks. Hale has always been a streak shooter (see his 22-point explosion in double-overtime of last year's opening round ACC Tournament game), but this year the only streak he's on is bricking. The team needs a shooter like Hale if they want to make some noise the rest of the season in the ACC. So how can Gaudio fix this?
The easy answer is to stop bringing Hale off the bench and insert him in the starting lineup. Perhaps Hale can't get in a rhythm as the sixth man. Freshman Jeff Teague starts at the 2 now, but he and Hale have comparable minutes (27.2 for Teague, 24.1 for Hale) so it's not like this would be an earth-shattering move for the team. Maybe it won't work, but at least it's something.

8) Getting Hale's confidence back is especially important for next season. With three huge frountcourt recruits joining Johnson, Williams and McFarland, the Deacs will need someone to shoot from the perimeter if they want to keep defenses honest. It will be up to Hale and Jeff Teague to provide that accuracy.

9) At this point in the season, there is barely any difference between the 3rd place team in the ACC and the 12th place team in the ACC. This makes the unbalanced schedule all the more awful. I hate John Swofford.

10) Tomorrow's game against Georgia Tech isn't being broadcast on any television station. It will instead be aired on the pay-per-view internet site ACCSelect.com. The Maryland-BC game tomorrow will be on ESPNU, a station nobody gets. I hate John Swofford.

Pobody's Nerfect! (Especially Those Cheatin' Patriots)

Photo courtsey: Boston.com

1) I didn't want the Giants to win, but I wanted the Patriots to win even less. I guess this means I'm happy but, to clarify, I'm much more excited about the cheaters finishing 18-1 rather than New York's victory.

2) The Patriots offensive line was horrendous. We've seen the Pats defense, rushing attack and special teams all struggle at points this year - hell, Brady even played poorly in the AFC Championship Game - but the one constant was the offensive line. The Giants, of course, played a huge role in the Pats' o-line's inability to block, but the Pats helped with their soft blocking schemes and poor positioning.
The team's play calling was also absymal. It was so un-Pats. Where were he downfield throws? Other than the awesome Wes Welker, who else made plays for New England? It certainly wasn't Tom Terrific. One on play late in the fourth, Randy Moss was as wide open as you'll ever see in the end zone and Brady inexplicably threw the ball four yards ahead of him. They eventually connected on a later TD, but still. Not that the loss is on Brady (I'd put it on defense, o-line, playcalling before getting near Brady), but did anyone else notice how he had a little temper flare up when things weren't going well? There was one play in the third quarter that the FOX cameras showed Brady yelling at someone after a bungled route. Troy Aikman took to Brady's defense, saying the receiver ran the wrong route. But when FOX showed the replay, the ball clearly sailed out of bounds, errant from any possible route the receiver could have won. I'm not knocking Brady; he played decently for much of the game considering the pressure he was facing and had a great penultimate drive, but maybe he was a bit frayed when things weren't going his way. Remember, the other Super Bowls were close, but the Pats offense was firing on all cylinders. Brady never played in a Super Bowl where his offense wasn't working well.
Oh, and Josh McDaniels stock dropped faster than Google's this week.
As for the defense, it was unfathomable why the continued to blitz Manning when they were getting absolutely no pressure despite bringing as many as seven defenders on some plays. Yet, there they were, blitzing Manning, who was able to find his receivers wide open consistently throughout the evening.

3) Eli played a great game at quarterback, particularly on the soon-to-be-famous 3rd down escape. (Even though that was aided by the Pats' wimpy tackling and an absurd catch by - who - Tyree? Smith?) But the MVP of the game should have been somebody on the Giants' defense. Even though his stat sheet wasn't impressive, I thought Osi Umenyiora was the best player on the field tonight. Justin Tuck also would have been a good choice. (And let's not ignore that Eli threw two brutal passes on that final scoring drive that should have been picked off.) But I can't hate on him tonight; he has been an excellent quarterback ever since Jeremy Shockey got hurt. It's going to be interesting to see what happens when Shockey comes back next season, because it's no coincidence that Eli finally started playing well when his mercurial tight end went down for the season.

4) ESPN.com is currently running a poll question asking where the Giants upset of New England ranks all-time. The answer: Not in the top 20. Not surprisingly though, 63% of respondents say it's in the top 5.
How can it be an upset when New England has been playing close games since Thanksgiving, barely beat the Giants in December and only squeaked by a San Diego team missing their best player in the AFC Championship? Had the Giants not scored on that last drive, New England would have finished 19-0 and everyone would have proclaimed them the greatest team of all-time. They wouldn't have been. The greatest team of all time doesn't struggle against a 10-6 squad in the Super Bowl. They don't need Ernest Wilford to drop a ball to beat Jacksonville at home in the Divisional Playoffs. And they don't need Rex Ryan calling a timeout to get by the lowly Ravens. The Pats were dominant early in the season, but came back to earth after their bye week. This loss might be surprising, but it's in no way shocking.

5) Why is challenging a 12 men on the field ruling allowed? Clearly, the refs ended up getting it right after the Pats threw the red flag when the Giants' Madison Hedgecock was late getting off the field during a Pats punt, I'm just not quite sure how why that challenge is allowed. (And before you think this is just my Pats-hate talking, my sister correctly pointed out that the Redskins successfully challenged this call earlier in the season.) How is challenging whether there are 12 men on the field any different than throwing a flag because you think the refs missed on an offsides penalty?

6) Nice call going for it on 4th and 13 instead of kicking a 49-yard field goal. Because, um, I believe the Patriots lost by 3 points. What were they thinking there? If it's 4th and 3, fine. Fourth and 6, maybe. But going for 4th and 13 or kicking a 49-yard FG in a wind-less environment? It's a no-brainer. Worst-case scenario; you miss and the Giants get the ball on the 39. Best case scenario, the kicker you pay to make 49-yard FGs succeeds in making a 49-yard FG and the score ends up being tied at the end of the game.
That decision was especially insane considering the Pats punted on a 4th and 2 from the Giants 40 earlier in the game. That goes back to the un-Pats-ness of the entire play calling.
When I used to play seasons on Madden, I'd always go 18-0 and then get to the Super Bowl, figuring I'd continue my domination on All-Madden level. But then when I got there, I'd play tentatively, getting out of my element. I was nervous and every play I made felt like the biggest play of the game. I'd overthink things, run plays I didn't run during the regular season and, frankly, disrespected my opponent so much that I didn't think it would even matter. And that's what New England did today. Going for the 4th and 13 was, as Bill Simmons writes, "an eff you" moment. (How stupid is that saying, by the way. "Eff you." Ooooh, it's slang in Britain. How clever you are. Let's go bum a fag to put in our beak and jaunt down to Essex, eh govnah! And, for that matter, I'm eagerly awaiting Simmons' post-loss column where he's sure to blame the refs and the SpyGate distractions for New England's inability to do anything correctly during the game. Shut up Mr. 42-17 and go focus on how the Celtics are going to choke in the NBA playoffs.)

7a) An underrated delight from tonight's result: Instead of having the 32nd pick in the NFL Draft, as was assumed, the Patriots earned the #31 pick by way of their Super Bowl loss. And since they have to forfeit that pick because they are dirty, lying cheaters, to me, it makes their historic punishment that much more hilarious knowing that there's another first round pick following their forfeiture. Had New England won, the Giants would have had the 31st pick and then we would have moved right on to the 2nd round and would have barely had time to mock the Pats. But now we can mock those two-bit swindlers in all the glory of round 1. Maybe only I'm excited about this though.

7b) The performance of the Giants defense tonight leads me to believe one thing: That Steve Spagnuolo will be named head coach of the Washington Redskins by Wednesday. Think about it: Dinny loves a big, hot name, Spagnuolo's stock will never be higher and Snyder is the guy who can pay Spagnuolo the most money. Unles Spagnuolo is a guy with no head coaching aspirations (and they do exist), it makes sense to come here. If he makes it work, he's a genius. It he doesn't, he was hindered by the two-headed Dinny monster. I mean, look at Norv Turner. He was a crappy coach in D.C. and has somehow parlayed that into two more head coaching gigs.
New reports suggest the 'Skins will talk to Spagnuolo on Tuesday but no longer have the desire to speak with Josh McDaniels, likely because he called the worst game in a Super Bowl since Mike Martz's bungling of the '01 Rams gave the Pats their first (and likely-tainted) Super Bowl win.

8) The Super Bowl commercials tonight were brutal. I don't remember anything in particularl, except a lot of screaming, yelling and animals. There was a pull-my-finger joke in there somewhere, but I think that might have been for the Maryland lottery and, thus, was not shown nationally.

9) Bill Belichick isn't just a cheater, he's an asshole:

I'll give him the benefit of the doubt and say that he didn't know the game wasn't over when he began walking on the field to do the perfunctory handshake with Tom Couhglin. But, when Belichick arrived at the mass of people, you can see referee Mike Carey talking to him, almost certainly telling Belichick that there's still one second on the clock. Belichick ignores this warning and jogs off the field into the locker room like the classless prick he is. Remember when Randy Moss did this in a week 17 game against the Redskins? He was eviscerated by the media for it. I hope Belichick gets the same treatment tomorrow. Simply and utterly classless. Name another coach in the NFL who would have pulled that crap? And don't even get me started on that red, short-sleeve hoodie he was wearing today. The NFL regulates shoe colors, helmet decals and personal messages to dead teammates. They didn't allow NFL coaches to wear suits on the sidelines for years. But they can't tell Belichick to not dress like a homeless man?

10) Dammit, does this mean we have to keep hearing about the '72 Dolphins now?

FINALLY!!!

After eight years of waiting, Art Monk was finally elected to the Pro Football Hall of Fame today. Joining him was teammate Darrell Green, who made it his first time on the ballot. My cousins and I are already planning our trip on August 2 to Canton, which will be awash that afternoon in a sea of burgundy and gold.

This Train Don't Stop Here Anymore

Momentarily forget the Gibbs retirement and subsequent bungling of the search for his successor. For tomorrow, 44 men will meet in Arizona to discuss, debate and vote on the newest class of the Pro Football Hall of Fame. There's a good chance that after the vote, Darrell Green, in his first year on the ballot, will become the second member of Joe Gibbs' three Super Bowl champion teams to earn an induction into the Hall. There's an equally good chance that Art Monk will once again be unjustly passed over, despite rumors that "this is finally his year".
In every year since 2004, I've written about why Monk deserves to make it to the Hall. He retired as the all-time reception leader in NFL history. He set the single-season reception record in 1984. He was a part of three Super Bowl champions. It's beginning to sound like a broken record. The stats are there and haven't gone anywhere in more than a decade. They were great when he retired, but look antiquated now in the era of the pass-happy offense. But even against his contemporaries, Monk keeps getting the short end while he sees lesser receivers and lesser men get in ahead of him.
Last year, Redskins fans got their hopes up because Peter King wrote in his online column that he'd finally be supporting Monk's candidacy. Monk didn't even make the Finals. This year, noted Monk-dissenter Dr. Z said he's changing his mind. As he told Pro Football Talk's Michael David Smith, "I figured, just put him the fuck in already. I'm tired of being the asshole." Dr. Z is a power player at the Hall meetings. His opinion means something. So if he's actually switched into the Pro-Monk camp, this could be big. So, once again, my hopes are high. If Monk, as usual, doesn't get the nod, I'll tell myself that I shouldn't be surprised. But I always am.
Instead of posting the same piece that I wrote four years ago and updated in '05 and '06, I decided to ask some of the biggest Redskins fans I know to share their memories of Monk and Darrell Green. (Click here if you want to read the semi-authortative "An Underappreciated Work of Art" post from February 2, 2006.) But first, let me jump into the fray by naming my top three Monk and Green moments.
Monk: 1) Breaking Largent's record on MNF. I had an early doctor's appointment in Georgetown that Tuesday morning, so I went to bed early. But, my mom woke me up even earlier the next morning to watch the VHS recording of Monk's record breaking catch.
2) Being in attendance when Monk tied Charlie Joiner for #3 on the all-time list in a 1991 game versus Houston.
3) Seeing Monk's devotion to team during the historic second quarter of Super Bowl XXII. While Doug Williams, Ricky Sanders, Gary Clark and Timmy Smith were getting all the touchdowns, Monk never seemed to mind, as long as his team was winning.
Green: 1) The Return
2) Watching him win those "NFL's Fastest Man" contests.
3) His final game ever, when he went back to return one last punt for old time's sake, taking a handoff from Champ Bailey and ending up being a busted block away from taking it to the house.

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My favorite Art Monk moment, in person, was Oct 12, 1992 when he caught an out pattern from Ryp and broke the all time receptions mark at RFK. Hands down, my favorite Monk moment.

I was also fortunate to see him take 2nd place all by himself on a diving td in the corner of the endzone at RFK against the Browns in 91.

Another Monk moment came in 1990 in the wild card game at the Vet, the same year as the body bag game, he went up and caught the td from Ryp that sealed the win over fat ass Buddy Ryan and the Eagles....

I agree that we say the same every year about why he should be in the hall of fame, it's getting ridiculous. I think this year is the year. If Chris Carter gets in, I'm gonna cry.

The DG moments that stand out:

The hurdle against the Bears of course, divisional playoff Jan 88, that sealed the win over the bears.

The following game he was part of the play on 4th and goal when Wade Wilson threw for Anthony Carter I believe and "The Redskins are going to the Super Bowl" Hey Frank.

He chased down Tony Dorsett as a rookie on MNF

I saw him chase down Eric Dickerson in the Wild Card win over the Rams in 1986. Same kind of play that he chased Dorsett on.

My 2 favorite INTs in person were the one against Warren Moon and the Oilers in OT (1991), Lohmiller then put the Redskins at 9-0.

The championship game that year as well, he picked off Andre Ware and coasted into the endzone to put the final touches on the trip to SB 26.

I know there are many more that I'm missing, but these are just a few.

Maybe these 2 should coach the Redskins...

- George

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Monk - retired as career leader in receptions. end of debate.

Green- ive lived my life by the words: 'tootsie roll baby, makes you run fast'. tho frankly i havent found that to be the case.

("For those who didn't grow up watching the 1987 Washington Redskins Super Bowl VHS tape, there's a scene before the '87 Divisional Playoff game in Chicago where Green talks to the camera and shows them his secret: He stuck Tootsie Rolls in his socks. I couldn't find a picture or video clip of that, but I did stumble across visual proof that the Tootsie Rolls do work. Wolfman, you might want to avert your eyes... -- Chaz)

- Rob

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Darrell Green -

1. In my humble opinion, I believe Darrell Green belongs in the Hall of Fame for the following reasons:

*great role model and the ultimate team player (never took a play off and gave it 110% every time he stepped on the field)
*he has won championships (2 super bowls)
*played for 1 team for almost 20 years (still unbelievable and don't think this will ever be duplicated again)
*the first true shutdown corner
*raised the bar to another level at his position with his speed (was the fastest player in the entire NFL throughout his career- still the fastest player on the redskins even at end of his career)
*never lost a step and went out on his own terms
*7 pro bowls
*clutch player in the biggest games
* community work for the DC area - I remember how he was always involved with the community and helped start learning centers for young kids
*Greatest Redskin of All Time

2. My favorite memories from #28:

* even though he was small, seeing DG always get in there and always do whatever it took to stop his opponent. hitting bigger receivers and backs without hesitation even though they were
much bigger and stronger than he was
*watching him win the fastest man award several times (especially when he beat the younger guys)
* every time I saw him run with the football. it was simply amazing. he could take it to the house at anytime.
* catching Dorsettt from behind. still unbelievable
* punt return for a touchdown in playoffs vs. Chicago in soldier field.

** favorite memory ever ->>> sealing a playoff victory at the goal line by breaking up a pass vs. Vikings (on fourth down!) to send us to the Super Bowl and watching #28 run down the field holding his hand
up. Wow! that was a great play! and Joe Gibbs reaction after getting up from his knees was a bonus.

I know I have many more great memories of #28, but these are the ones that stand out.

Art Monk -

1. In my humble opinion, I believe Art Monk belongs in the Hall of Fame for the following reasons:

* I believe there are only a few players in the history of the NFL that respected the game and prepared for every game the way Art Monk did (one of the smartest receivers in the history of the nfl)
* Superb role model and always sacrificed his stats for his team - always quiet and let his game and team success speak for itself
* always carried himself as a true professional
* 3 super bowl rings
* broke reception record and touchdown record (consecutive seasons with a touchdown)
* one of the first true big possession receivers in the game - never afraid to go across the middle
* one of the most underrated blocking receivers in the game. just destroyed defenders.
* in my opinion, if you ask Joe Gibbs who was his favorite redskin player, he would say Art Monk. I can almost guarantee it.
* he was a true hero to many of us (old and young)
* if you had to define the characteristics (on and more importantly off the field) of a true Hall of Famer, I couldn't think of anyone else other than Art Monk. How is he not in the Hall of Fame???

2. My favorite memories of Art Monk:

* breaking the all-time reception record. never saw Art Monk so happy. I think his teammates were happier than he was as they carried him in the air. Shows how much of a team loved him.
* all of his TD catches in Texas Stadium
* how we always went across the middle with no fear and kept the chains rolling.
* the 1000 yard season he had along with the rest of the Posse (R. Sanders and G. Clark)
* breaking tackles against other DB's . tough to bring him down
* his performance in Bills SuperBowl... i think he had over 100 yards that game.

I know there were many more memories of #81, but these came to me right away.
I believe what defines Art Monk's career is consistency. He wasn't flashy and never brought too much attention to himself, but he left everything on the field after every game and all he wanted to do was help his team win the game. I believe this is the reason he is not in the Hall of Fame.
Because he was unselfish and sacrificed his stats for his team. That's just wrong man. That's exactly the kind of person that belongs in the Hall of Fame.

I guess you gotta snort Cocaine and disrespect the game to have a bust in the Hall of Fame. ("If Cris Carter and Michael Irvin are in the Hall of Fame before Art Monk; I don't even know what I'd do. Probably something that revolves around an avacado, an icepick and my snorkel. And I'd probably call up the guy who plays Marlo in The Wire for some backup insurance." -- Chaz)

I just got really angry all of the sudden. I'm going across the street and getting a shot. ("I have no doubt about that" -- Chaz)

- Tony T aka The Commish
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darrell green favorite moments, in descending order:
3 -- diving in front of chris (or anthony?) carter ("Anthony" -- Chaz) in the end zone to
break up the pass that clinched the nfc title

("Two things to notice in this clip. First, how awesome RFK is. It gives me goosebumps just thinking about that place. Secondly, notice how Pat Summerall and John Madden stay silent after the play is over. They let the pictures tell the words. It's a shame more announcers don't follow that lead today." -- Chaz)

2 -- "tootsie roll baby. makes you run faster."
1 -- The Return

art monk:
this is going to sound insincere, but it isn't. i actually gained respect for monk -- i know, it hardly seems possible -- just this year when i heard an interview he did where he says he doesn't even really love football. watching football, that is. he doesn't glue himself to the tv on sunday; if there's a good movie on, he'll watch that instead. he simply loved to play the game. i don't know why, but that to me is exactly why art monk is a fantastic person, and why he'll never be chosen for the hall of fame.

- Eric

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So, you see? It's not just me that loves Art Monk and thinks he belongs in the Hall of Fame. There are others out there who want to see one of their childhood sports heroes earn the recognition he deserves. If you want to find all of us tomorrow night, we'll probably meet up with Tony to join him for that shot. Hopefully, it will be a celebratory one.

Be sure to check back tomorrow afternoon; you'll either see a tribute to the triumphs of high achievement or an expletive-laden diatribe about how Peter King wouldn't know a Hall of Famer if it jumped out of his skinny mocha no foam frappacino.